STORY 5......FIRE ANTS

Mom: "Someone call your dad for breakfast." It was a Sunday. My brother-in-law, my sister, my wife at the time, myself, my brother, and my parents.

Me: "He's not in the house, mom."

Mom: "Well, where is he?"

Me: "I see him. He's out front."

Mom: "What's he doing now?"

And there's my dad. Going back and forth from the front entrance walkway to the garage.

DO. DO. DO. DO. We look out the window.

Me: "Mo-ooom!......Dad's got a gas can. And he's pouring it on the walkway."

Me: "Mo-ooom!......Dad's getting a match."

Mom: "Oh, dear lord." as my mom comes to the window with the rest of us. It happens. My dad strikes a match.

BOOM!

And I swear to god, I thought my dad blew up. The sidewalk ignited, My dad ran for cover. His hat went flying. My mom runs to the door.

Mom: "Are you okay?! For Pete's sake, what are you doing?"

He said: "I was trying to get rid of the ants."

That was my dad. If some was good, more was better. So instead of pouring a little bit of gas where the ants were, he decided to dose the entire sidewalk. And almost blew himself off the yard.