Where the work meets the proof.
A thought from the field, with the science underneath it. Weekly. For the work that keeps you in your own life.
What a man can do when he’s been feeling shame
A friend who carried shame alone since he was a teenager, and what it actually costs a man to keep something like that hidden. The research says the fix isn’t complicated — it just doesn’t stick without practice.
Read more →“Does gratitude actually keep contempt out?”
Contempt is one of the biggest killers in relationships. Gratitude might be the only thing that keeps it out. The research says the feeling isn’t enough — somebody has to say it first.
Read more →“What is a man actually doing when he takes grief and turns it into something?”
A utility bill, a camera held up with duct tape, and five lines from a counsellor. What the research says about transmutation, expressive writing, and why showing up is what brings people to you.
Read more →“Has anyone actually looked into beets and what is, or isn’t, happening in your pants?”
Two guys, some beets in their morning smoothie, and a question about what’s happening downstairs. Turns out the nitric oxide pathway has a very direct answer.
Read more →“What does a grieving man do when what I call easy healing won’t cut it?”
A year of loss, a woman who held all of it, and why handing the whole load to one person is still easy healing in disguise. What the research says about rebound and avoidance in the first year.
Read more →“Put certain things together and the whole bowl goes bad faster.”
A hunch about fruit bowls and relationships. Turns out the science backs both of them up. And the fix is simpler than you think.
Read more →Neediness Isn’t the Problem. The Wall Around the Need Is.
The difference between having a need and being needy. What the research says about what it costs men to suppress what they actually require.
Read more →“My first real Father’s Day.”
Twenty-five years of work and waiting and not knowing if there’d ever be a door......and the door opened that small.
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